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Showing posts with label FOOTBALL. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FOOTBALL. Show all posts
WORLD CUP TIP(TOE)S
We just hung this up outside my office.World Cup starts today. Yay! I would support England coz Rooney is the White Pele, but I can't hide my contempt for John Terry. And Frank Lampard. And Ashley Cole. So ...
Go Ghana!
Or Cameroon (who have better chance in their group).
Or any of the African teams.
Or any of the developing countries from Asia and South America (Argentina and Brazil not included).
Or Spain - especially Xavi and Iniesta.
Or anyone but Italy, or France, or frickin' Germany.
As I have said before on this blog, the best football team the World Cup has ever seen was the Colombia squad of 1994...
As I have said before on this blog, the best football team the World Cup has ever seen was the Colombia squad of 1994...
I just noticed the goalkeeper Rene Higuita in this pic, on his tippy-toes trying to look taller...
LOVE MOURINHO, HATE MATERAZZI
I have so much respect for Jose Mourinho. The guy is passionate, whip-smart, brutally honest, and funny as heck. But why is he friends with a goon like Marco Materazzi?
Zidane showed everyone the best way of dealing with that scumbag.
Zidane showed everyone the best way of dealing with that scumbag.
Can't wait for the World Cup
My only problem with this Puma spot: why don't the use some African music instead of that fat guy from Dangermouse?
CRISTIANO RONALDO TRICKS
Manchester United captain Rio Ferdinand has launched an online magazine called #5 - named after the number of his jersey. As you might imagine, it's completely smothered in cheeze sauce, but this video of Ronaldo showing off his football tricks had me mesmerized.
CRISTIANO'S MAM
Am I being crazy or does Cristiano Ronaldo's 54-year-old mother, Delores Oviedo, dress the same as the footballer-friendly girls her son is partial to spitroasting?
FYI: The model's polo-neck blouse was designed by Ronaldo, a style icon, and is only available at CR7, the fashion store Cristiano opened in his home town of Funchal.
FYI: The model's polo-neck blouse was designed by Ronaldo, a style icon, and is only available at CR7, the fashion store Cristiano opened in his home town of Funchal.
WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS FOOTBALL TEAM
The most dangerous football team to ever tred on a pitch were Colombia's national side of the early 90s. Armed-to-the-teeth with slinky skills, they had jheri-curls and blonde afros, partied with Pablo Escobar and married porn stars. Collectively, these players got arrested for shooting off machine guns, imprisoned for kidnapping, banned for testing positive for cocaine, extradited on narco-trafficking and money laundering charges, and then had plastic surgery on their face, live on Colombian reality TV.
Aside from what they did in their private lives, on the field, in 1993/94, the team was on firey form. In that particular season, these bandidos were the most daring, most exotic, most explosive crop of football talent on earth.
Love the audio on this clip.
After demolishing Argentina 5-0 in Buenos Aires and qualifying undefeated from the South American group stages of the World Cup, people like me and Pele tipped them to do very well in the competition.
In goal was Rene Higuita, nicknamed "El Loco", The Crazy One. He invented the Scorpion Kick.
The
baddest
move
in
football.
Higuita was known for taking insane risks and coming out of the goalkeeper's area - which made him prone to howling errors, like when Cameroonian Roger Milla made him look a fool in 1990 World Cup Finals.
Higuita was imprisoned in 1993 after getting involved in a drug cartel kidnapping during which he received $64,000 for acting as a go-between for the drug barons Pablo Escobar and Carlos Molina.
His playing career ended after he tested positive for cocaine while at an Ecuadorian club. Higuita then participated in a Colombian reality TV program show where he had cosmetic surgery on air. Currently, he's hoping to go into management or politics.
My favourite football player when I was a kid was the Colombian captain marvel Carlos Valderrama, nicknamed "El Pibe" or "The Kid". Here's The Kid with his kid.
He had this lazily deceptive style, where he'd play lots of short, simple passes then suddenly snap a killer ball in behind the opposition's defence.
Everyone wanted to get to know El Pibe.
Carlos bro-ing out with Diego.
An amazing, 22-foot-tall bronze statue of Carlos Valderrama was been erected in his hometown of Santa Marta.
Known as "The Octopus" for his long-limbed, bendy and unpredictable style, Faustino Asprilla was world-class striker.
He also posed naked in magazines and married a porn star. He has a big penis, as you can see.
Asprilla loves guns and gets into trouble for stuff like shooting his horse dead, threatening his teammates with a pistol during training, and carrying weapons around in his car.
A box-to-box powerhouse, Freddy Rincon destroyed the midfield and also liked to get forward and score goals. In 2007, he came under criminal investigation in Colombia and Panama, accused of collaboration with cocaine kingpin Pablo Rayo Montaño and suspicion of money laundering. He is currently in Brazil awaiting extradition.
Unfortunately this Colombian dream team FLOPPED at the 1994 World Cup. Shamefully, they even got beat by the USA. Colombian drug gangs were so pissed off that they killed one of the players. Witness said the killer shouted "Gooooooooooooool!" (mimicking Latin American TV commentators) for each of the 12 bullets fired into his body.
That's what it was like playing for the most dangerous team in the world.
I'LL BE SUPPORTING THE ORANJE AT EURO 2008
The realisation that England wont be at Euro 2008 has just sunk in and I'm really pissed off, this is only the third time England have failed to reach a major tournament in my life and against the USA last week we had 6 Champions League winners in our starting 11. Last time we failed to qualify in '94 I predicited that Columbia would win the World Cup, they ended up bottom of their group and their defender was shot dead because he scored an own goal, this time time I'm not going to predict as I know I'll be wrong but I hope the Dutch win. They may not be as good as Dutch teams of the past like '74 and '88 but for such a small country they always play great football, they hate the Germans just as much as we do, they actually have a worse record at penalties than us, they invented total football and they had great players like Marco Van Basten who in my opinion is the greatest striker ever and Frank Rijkaard who spat in Rudi Völler's perm.
HOW GERMANS CELEBRATE WINNING THE LEAGUE
This is how German football team FC Koln celebrate winning promotion to the Bundesliga, by pulling down a players shorts and spraying some strange looking white substance on his bare ass.
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